He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize