Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
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