I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
