Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
