Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Randomize
