The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
