theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
