How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize