a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
