i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
