You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Randomize