you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize