i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
