I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
