More tranny stories later!
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
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