We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
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