at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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