i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
