I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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