Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
