every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
well, you know. whores of a feather.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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