Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Randomize
