No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Your dad touched me again.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
