Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
