i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Randomize
