love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Randomize
