She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
NoShamevember. You game?
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
