Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
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