Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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