Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Randomize
