She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
