Kiss
Puke
You're so nebulous sometimes
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
