You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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