Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Randomize
