seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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