This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
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