4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
