Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
