Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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