We're like a lot better than the average bears
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
