yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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