i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
