More tranny stories later!
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
