There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Can't talk, ducks in the car
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
