you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
