A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
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