PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
I look better un-naked...
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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