Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
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