KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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