I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
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