Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize