why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
